2001:
- Went to Las Vegas
- Rented a Corvette
- Stayed up until 4:34AM playing casino war at the Circus Circus, won $250
- Front row seat to see George Carlin at the MGM
- Went to take a piss at a urinal, and standing next to me was Charles Barkley (no, I did not look)
2004:
- Went to Las Vegas
- Saw Mitch Hedberg, Dave Attell, and Lewis Black
- Rented a gigantic suite at the Stardust
- Shot 100 rounds of belt-fed ammunition through a full-auto M-249 machine gun
- Jumped out of a plane at 16,000 feet.
2013:
- Night before: got takeout from P.F. Chang’s. Rented I Love You, Man.
- Drank NyQuil.
- Went to a Weight Watchers meeting. Gained 1.4 pounds.
- Got a six egg white omelet and fruit salad for lunch.
- Went grocery shopping.
- Practiced bass 90 minutes.
- Slept through the football game.
- Made vegetarian tacos for dinner.
Disclaimer: I will actually be going to LA next weekend for my birthday. I hope I am not sick by then.