This is a list of all of the stuff on my desk. Note that I don’t always write fiction-type stuff at my desk, because I work all day there, and it usually works out better when I write sitting on the couch in the living room, with actual sunlight and windows and whatnot.
- Macbook Pro, Lenovo Thinkpad T410 – personal and work machines, respectively. They both sit on top of each other, the Mac on the top, and run in clamshell 100% of the time, feeding into a KVM switch.
- USB hub – connected to the Mac. It usually has an extension cord plugged into it for when my Zoom B3 is sitting on the desk and I’m playing the bass. It also has a FitBit charging cradle plugged into it.
- WikiReader portable wikipedia offline reader thing I was talking about the other day, and its manual.
- A flexible cable tie that I use to hang onto all of the disconnected cords from the Mac when I take it elsewhere, so I don’t spend 45 minutes trying to dig them up again after they fall behind the desk every goddamn time I disconnect the computer.
- The Mac remote that came with my last MacBook, which still works for the new one, because at some point, Apple stopped including them, which is a damn shame.
- A printout of a McKinsey report on disruptive technologies which is mostly bullshit about automated cars that S printed out for me and I feel like I should read, but after skimming it, I thought it was mostly buzzwords.
- A pair of M-Audio studio monitors.
- A Toshiba 1.5Tb portable USB hard drive.
- A bunch of different smart vitamins that I never take, because I’m not smart enough to remember. They currently include L-Theanine, Ginkgo Biloba, and Huperzine A.
- A set of nose filters, which you are supposed to put in your nostrils and filter out air to prevent allergies. They mostly work, but are really annoying and they push out your nostrils and make you look like a pig-alien from that episode of The Twilight Zone where everyone was horribly ugly, and the really hot chick couldn’t get surgery to look like them.
- Someone’s address clipped off of the corner of an envelope.
- My iPad on a stand that’s actually a wire cookbook holder, but only cost $4.
- A bunch of Coke reward codes torn off of cases of Coke Zero. I collect them, but I’m really lazy about entering them, so they accumulate.
- The iPad to USB camera connector adapter.
- A pair of foam earplugs, which always remind me of when I worked in a factory and had to wear them constantly.
- A stack of post it notes, in the following colors: pink, yellow, pink, a white one from Samsung for some “Change and Innovation” bullshit program that nobody paid any attention to, pink, purple, yellow.
- A bunch of cashed checks and the payment coupon booklet for my HOA.
- A hexagon-shaped pencil holder with about a dozen and a half pens, a Palm Pilot stylus, a couple of Ikea golf pencils, and a sword letter opener with the handle broken off.
- A half-empty bottle of Purell hand sanitizer, refreshing aloe flavor.
- A Verilux table lamp.
- A goLite M2 full-spectrum light.
- A Kensington trackball.
- An Apple Magic Trackpad.
- A Kinesis Advantage keyboard.
- A Guitar Center receipt.
- A cloth napkin.
- A copy of “Slap Bass: The Ultimate Guide” by Ed Friedland, on DVD.
- These stupid Virgin Mobile prepaid phone cards, which I cannot get rid of. (If you use Virgin Mobile prepaid, please email me and I will sell them at a loss.)
- A pad of paper.
- A stack of received postcards.
- The instruction manual to a Meteor USB Mic.
- The medication guide for Zolpidem tablets, which I do not take, but which I found amusing, because it says “After taking zolpidem, you may get out of bed while not being fully awake and do an activity that you do not know you are doing.” The activities listed include driving a car and having sex.
I also have a monitor and a webcam, but they are not really on my desk; they’re mounted to a stand that is mounted to the back of my desk.