I go to the movies every damn weekend, and I see some occasional good movies, a lot of okay ones, and a fair number of bad ones. I never write this shit down, and maybe I should. I just don’t want to turn into a movie reviewer and have to remember how many stars I gave what; I just want to remember that I saw a movie in the theater so I don’t rent it six months later and then find out ten minutes and six dollars later that I already saw and hated the damn thing.
Here’s the last couple of weeks:
Denzel Washington is an alcoholic airline pilot who manages to land a crashing plane without killing every person on board, antics ensue. This movie was a straight down the middle C for me, because it had some suspense, but it was so goddamn formulaic, it was ridiculous. Also, it made me go home and fall into a deep k-hole reading NTSB incident reports, which probably wasted a week of my time.
Denzel is a good actor, but I wouldn’t call this performance mind-blowing. The theater was crowded as fuck though, the temperature was 96 degrees, and they must have shown 90 minutes of trailers. We were all awarded with some nice full frontal of Nadine Velazquez, though. (At least Denzel had access to a perfect landing strip at the beginning of the movie.)
I heard little about this movie going into it, and expected more involving the plane crash, but that part of the movie ends quickly, and you go into this long-form alcoholic denial trip, which was okay, but I’ve already seen that after-school special. I’d give this a strong three and a half stars out of five, and it’s a good rental, but you probably won’t catch this one on the plane.
End of Watch
There was nothing to watch this weekend, so we went and saw this. I hate to harp on a movie for being plotless, since I basically write plotless books, but this was a plotless movie. It’s basically a character study about these two cops driving around south central LA, with a lot of detail about their respective wife/girlfriends, a small amount of detail on inter-office politics at a police station, and a largely wooden story about Mexican cartels. The whole thing is shot to look like it was taped on video cameras as part of a school project, like a “found footage” thing. But this combined with the generic suspense of the story made me feel like I was doing tape tracking of raw footage for COPS episodes. Seriously, about an hour into it, I got this weird disassociated feeling, and thought “am I still watching a movie?” It sort of felt like I was sitting through a TV show I had no interest in.
Takeaways to this: Jake Gyllenhaal could totally play Paul Ryan in a biopic if he got the right hairpiece. Anna Kendrick looks suspiciously like Adam Scott (Ben on Parks and Rec) and that always bothers me. I won’t spoil the ending, but it’s stupid. 2/5.